discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
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