just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
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