so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
