During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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