I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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