Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Randomize
