oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
So much Jack, so little girl.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
