The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
