Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize