The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
tell me about the fingering
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