Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize