Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize