so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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