It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
