I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
No subtext here. People are naked.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
