I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
He shit in the fireplace
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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