Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
