well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
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