big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
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