White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
