he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
He called his prostate his "boner button".
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
You are a genius and a whore.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
