Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
