i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
This gyro tastes like lonliness
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
