This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
