I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
