why didn't you poke me back
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
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