so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
