First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
