Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
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