Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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