I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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