I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
