Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
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