i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize