do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Randomize
