Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
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