You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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