His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
the day after is always just damage control
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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