Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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