No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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