Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
its liver damage thursday
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
