I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Randomize
