"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
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