Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
