I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
