Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize
