sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize