Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
