That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
