You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Randomize
