He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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